The man behind the @GSElevator Twitter account which purportedly chronicles conversations overheard in the lift at Goldman Sachs has been revealed as 34 year-old Texan John Lefevre.
The account, which has 640,000 followers, amused and shocked readers with snippets of Goldman Sachs employees’ supposed conversations.
Lefevre received a six-figure sum last month for a book based on the tweets.
Here are some of the best:
#1: The NSA is the only branch of the government that actually listens to people.
— GS Elevator Gossip (@GSElevator) February 13, 2014
#1: Only Neanderthals resort to violence. I prefer crushing one’s spirit, hope, or ego.
— GS Elevator Gossip (@GSElevator) December 25, 2013
#1: Let’s be honest. There’s no way your guess is as good as mine.
— GS Elevator Gossip (@GSElevator) November 6, 2013
#1: Poor people eat so much fast food you’d think their time was valuable.
— GS Elevator Gossip (@GSElevator) September 24, 2013
#1: Most people wouldn’t even be the main character in a movie about their own lives.
— GS Elevator Gossip (@GSElevator) August 19, 2013
#1: Vegetarian is an ancient derogatory term for an idiot who couldn’t fish or hunt.
— GS Elevator Gossip (@GSElevator) August 8, 2013
#1: How easily someone is offended is directly proportional to how stupid they are.
— GS Elevator Gossip (@GSElevator) July 12, 2013
#1: I already know I’m going to Hell. So, at this point, it’s go big or go home.
— GS Elevator Gossip (@GSElevator) June 16, 2013
#1: Not only did I forget her name in the morning, I forgot what I told her my name was too.
— GS Elevator Gossip (@GSElevator) May 12, 2013
#1: No one would run a marathon if they had to sign a confidentiality agreement first.
— GS Elevator Gossip (@GSElevator) May 1, 2013
#1: You don’t feed wild animals b/c they become dependent and can’t fend for themselves. How’s it different for poor people?
— GS Elevator Gossip (@GSElevator) March 17, 2013
#1: If there’s a hot chick behind me at the ATM, I’ll always leave my receipt in the machine so she can see the balance.
— GS Elevator Gossip (@GSElevator) March 11, 2013
#1: I wear a brand new pair of socks every day. That’s probably my only indulgence. That, and watches… And wine.
— GS Elevator Gossip (@GSElevator) January 22, 2013
#1: You can always tell which people are riding bikes for exercise and which ones are doing it because they can’t afford cars.
— GS Elevator Gossip (@GSElevator) January 11, 2013
#1: The white board in the conference room looks likes Fermat’s Last Theorem. #2: Erase it just in case it was the janitor.
— GS Elevator Gossip (@GSElevator) December 17, 2012
#1: Almost time for children to learn a valuable life lesson. Santa loves rich kids more.
— GS Elevator Gossip (@GSElevator) December 3, 2012
#1: The lottery is just a way of taxing poor people who don’t know math.
— GS Elevator Gossip (@GSElevator) November 26, 2012
#1: These idiots won’t understand hyperinflation until it takes $100 in food stamps to trade for a bottle of gin.
— GS Elevator Gossip (@GSElevator) November 7, 2012
Skirt #1: I can always tell a banker within the first 2 minutes of meeting him in a bar… because he tells me.
— GS Elevator Gossip (@GSElevator) August 31, 2012
#1: My only flaw, if I have one, is that I can sometimes be a little bit racist.
— GS Elevator Gossip (@GSElevator) August 18, 2012
#1: I never give money to homeless people. I can’t reward failure in good conscience.
— GS Elevator Gossip (@GSElevator) August 8, 2012
#1: Great Britain, a country that has been on a managed decline since 1945, has no choice but to embrace mediocrity.
— GS Elevator Gossip (@GSElevator) July 27, 2012
#1: Am I the only person who rooted against Robin Hood, the world’s first thug communist?
— GS Elevator Gossip (@GSElevator) June 29, 2012
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